Secret Snackers T-Shirts

"Don't tell coach about this- he doesn't want us to be friends."

'Be honest. Does this double bacon cheeseburger with large fries and shake make me look fat?'

Vending machine: NO stress, only 50 cents.

Honest Vending

"I want some long, thin square ones - for chips..."

"I'm afraid it's not cheese, it's 'cheese-like'."

"Tragic case of having the fridge from the TV when the World Cup is showing."

"Nice try, Mom, but I'm going to go with a caterer."

"My parents won't allow sugar in the house, so I've had to learn about it on the street."

"I like to use new Bible words. Let's beseech Mom for cookies."

Secret sweetie drawer...

"Works every time."

Fishing rod coming out of a health farm towards a hot dog stand.

"Whoa! One last doughnut left."

Breakfast surreal.

"Always faithful to arrive early and, of course, get the dibs on the jelly doughnuts."

In prehistoric times, there were hunters, gatherers and guys who never had change.

Student Food Pyramid

Bill stumbles upon an automated taco maker.

"Don't make me resort to alternative questioning techniques."

"Oh, there will be an investigation!"

"Quit chasing carbs, try a protein bar."

Gym. Whatever weight I manage to lose here I always seem to find on my way home. Donuts.

Give me a child at seven and I will show you the MAN!

Romulus and Remus and the Vending Machine

"You complete me."

'Beer? Wassat then?'

The Pope getting a Popsicle for Popes from the Freezer

"So which one of you pesky dogs stole the last cookie from the bottom of the jar?"

"It's a map to the vending machines."

'Because it's there!'

'Is it all right if I have a snack out of the refrigerator?'

'Why would you need GPS? Have you suddenly forgotten how to get from the couch to the refrigerator?'

Honest Vending Machine

Need something from the fridge? This looks like a job for...Indoorman!