Sneaky Snack Saver T-Shirts

'My wife has me on a very strict diet so I need a safe place to store my binge foods.'

Bad for you but to die for

'Be honest. Does this double bacon cheeseburger with large fries and shake make me look fat?'

Vending machine: NO stress, only 50 cents.

"I want some long, thin square ones - for chips..."

Honest Vending

Secretive Weigh In.

"Nice try, Mom, but I'm going to go with a caterer."

"My parents won't allow sugar in the house, so I've had to learn about it on the street."

"To lose weight they said I've just had to give up two things. . .food and drink!"

Champagne

"Works every time."

"I like to use new Bible words. Let's beseech Mom for cookies."

Fishing rod coming out of a health farm towards a hot dog stand.

In prehistoric times, there were hunters, gatherers and guys who never had change.

"Don't tell coach about this- he doesn't want us to be friends."

'The doctor said my body is 40% fat. These cookies are only 20% fat. That's got to help.'

"Always faithful to arrive early and, of course, get the dibs on the jelly doughnuts."

Student Food Pyramid

Bill stumbles upon an automated taco maker.

'Mom can I have another apple?'

'Beer? Wassat then?'

The Pope getting a Popsicle for Popes from the Freezer

"Quit chasing carbs, try a protein bar."

"So which one of you pesky dogs stole the last cookie from the bottom of the jar?"

Budget Munchies

Romulus and Remus and the Vending Machine

"You complete me."

"Don't make me resort to alternative questioning techniques."

Give me a child at seven and I will show you the MAN!

"It's a map to the vending machines."

'Because it's there!'

'Why would you need GPS? Have you suddenly forgotten how to get from the couch to the refrigerator?'