Secret Play Planners Gifts

'Alright, huddle up, we are now going to discuss our top-secret play!'

Coach to football players: 'And no cuddling!'

"I still plan to be a cowboy when I grow up. If I'm going to service my share of the national debt, I might as well have fun doing it."

"I remember when the death of the hero meant the end of the sequels. Now it marks the beginning of the prequels."

"I'm just going to ring the doorbell so I have a chance of a spot in the bed."

'We apologise for the delay to the yum-yum train.'

Cindy's imaginary friend has the day off so the agency send over a temp to fill in.

"If you have any gossip, tell me now - she could come back ay second."

'Blimey, boss - that's a bit revolutionary, isn't it?'

What did I tell you two about somersaults?

'And there he was shouting: 'A horse, a horse, my kingdom for a horse!'... I thought to myself: Why not...'

Who's the kid with the predator drone?

'I see you've renamed your portfolios Moe, Larry and Curley.'

Babies

Australian baby with toys hanging from his hat rather than corks

Praying for a goal assist.

"It's a game where we roll the dice to see which destination wedding we should spend our savings on this year."

A Family Out For A Walk In The Country.

'Is it all right if I have a snack out of the refrigerator?'

"This better be important."

'... I'll take the handoff to the tailback, then give the ball to my stunt double here, and he will dive head-first into the end zone.'

101 uses of a dead cat: rocking horse

'It's a very realistic set that even comes with contract specifications and outrageous bid proposals.'

'What the . . . no wonder we can't gain any yards. We've been fitted with radio collars...'

"Where does it say anything about an age limit?"

"Psst. Pass it on. Tonight's the break!..."

"The kindergarteners have breached their classroom confines, and are headed this way. We'll be overrun within minutes. What should we do?"

The whole club stands behind the coach...

'And that's the quickest way out of the car park after the game.'

Gracie hatches a plan to trap Santa.

"We just want a vacation --- we don't want to learn anything."

'Get the stretcher! He's got a mole on his leg that looks a little funky!!'

Man planning on standing on a turntable to aid hammer throw.

School Trip To The Beach

'He's using a cheat sheet, ump! Can he do that?'