Sea Survivor T-Shirts

'Thank you for calling the Coast Guard help line. To sink, press one. To swim, press two…'

Man following advice on preventing sea-sickness but becoming sea-sick anyway

'I said, now I know why they call you 'Lucky'!'

'It's a good thing my glasses were washed overboard!'

A holiday maker greets a castaway

"I just assumed that the whale we adopted would stay in the ocean."

'Why, I don't exactly know -- how long HAVE we been here, Bobo?'

Lighthouse has energy efficient light bulb.

'Mind how you cross the ocean.'

Emergency Pants

Help! Send fishing tackle!

'Throw them back They're not what nine out of ten eye doctor's recommend for dry eyes when stranded on a desert island.'

Warmer Oceans/Apathy/Green Washing

"I'm starting up a concierge medicine practice. You in?"

"Try to eat more coconuts and fish."

'He needs professional HELP!'

"It's a letter from my boss. He says he's not paying me for the time I've been stranded on this island."

'I've made a radio using coconuts, salt water, and a trout.'

"Now that we've fermented coconut milk, so we build a boat or a tiki bar?"

Desert island has bottle bank and paper bank. Castaway sees message in bottle float towards island.

'What luck!'

"Well, if you don’t want to discuss exposure, drowning or sharks, what do you want to talk about?"

Last Blue Tuna.

'I wish the different international teams of scientists would agree on a standard tagging system...'

"Mr. Crusoe, you have some heft overdue fines."

A diet high in cholesterol can be dangerous to your health.

Stranded Techie Needs Batteries

'Don't they look silly?'

Whaling boat with banner 'Save the krill'.

Welcome centre

'Grandpa stop! That's not a jellyfish! It's a plastic bag!'

'What luck. It's Kosher.'

Women castaways are joined on the island by ugly men.

The menu said this soup is recommended for mature diners, and is rated "AFS." What does that stand for? "Adult fly situations."

"Well, my pension was tied up in the cruise liner industry."