Scrum Master Pillows

"...and this is our Agile project!"

"I see your problem, honey. You're doing everything 'waterfall'. You should switch to 'agile'."

"Here's another one written in E minor and in case you haven't guessed by now, it's the only chord I know."

Out and In.

"Although technically it's a profit and loss statement, the narrative is admittedly rather one-sided."

"Oh, oh, it seems they've had a little trouble with the hand-off in lane number three."

'Mr. McCoy has been expecting you. If you'll have a seat, he should be with you within the next 6 hours.'

A new schoolmaster testing students on geography

"You scratch my back, I'll scratch your is just a figure of speech, Ned. A little left, and higher."

"He's so into social media that he's become anti-social."

'I should never have married a bloody referee.'

"I didn't have a carrot so I used a fish stick for his nose."

"Just when they thought it was safe to go back in the water, the great fish emerged from below."

Accounting: Desk trays - 'Accounts receivable' and 'Accounts deceivable'.

Gardening Tips - training fruit trees can greatly increase their yield

Schoolmaster drenched by prank bucket on door.

Jeepers Creepers Billy, Can you wait until halloween to wear that? You're scaring me half to death.

"Inland Revenue office. 'Excuse my maths won't you?'"

Team Work

Kevin was very houseproud and it showed.

At the schoolmaster's porch

'Never mind dear, at least you cut him with your razor sharp wit.'

'IT'S A SNOW-GHOST!'

Supermarket customer types.

The Yorkshire schoolmaster at the Saracen's Head

'It doesn't contain anything that'll help you find a job.'

'Mr. Pilbeam will be your new elite geography teacher this term.'

'I'm a self-made man!'

Trick-or-Treat At Own Risk

'The 10th and the 11th are definitely out.. How about the 12th of never?'

Steerforth and Mr. Mell

'These are excellent qualifications ... so good that our largest competitor would pay you twice as much.'

"It's a shame, he has masses of experience...."

Very Like It.

"O.K., toss and turn and sigh so loud that I have to wake up and ask what's wrong."