Screw Sorter Gifts

Useful and Useless Screws

The Wine Bottle and the Corkscrew

The dumpster code - find something, leave something.

"...it's another metal detector."

"I've heard of being organized, but isn't this a little obsessive compulsive?"

Bathroom shelf full of clocks and pills.

Wino Appreciation Group

Long Corkscrew

"Dad needs a Phillips screwdriver. Who's Phillip?"

Screw plastic surgeon.

Bottle Opener Strikes A Red Wine Well

The Conveyance of a Corkscrew Hand

HR worker wading through CV's.

'My wife doesn't appreciate that I push the envelope every day.'

"You've given me quite a turn. . . !"

"The beginning of another urban legend."

'Well, if it is the other end, why don't they just print 'open other end' on the bottom?'

In Tray Out Tray Suspicious Tray

Witness Protection Program

'Tolerance...Zero Tolerance'

'Forget it, they're gay.'

Hearts oh his countrymen: G. Washington...FIRST...ETC

'Great Books' 'Good Books' 'Trash'

Olde Time Dance Society

"Today, in Metalwork, we learned how to cut a slit in the heads of screws."

Alternate corkscrew

"Yes, I do all my shopping online. How did you know?"

'This pitcher throws screwballs. Better hand me my 'special' bat.'

Flower Arranging.

"But you told me to invest more money in the product of screws!"

Time to toss this skirt. You never wear it. I will someday. This blouse has a stain and a rip. You can scrub and sew it! Ok. I give up. It really IS hard to come out of the closet.

"What? The survival TV program I'm going to be on allows me to bring one item, crucial for my well being."

'Jimmy, what are you doing? The whole house will fall apart!'

A middle-manager relaxing on his day off...

"We ran some tests, and it turns out that Dr. Stephens here is a Hufflepuff, whereas I'm more of a Ravenclaw."