Screen To Script Lover T-Shirts

TV tie-in book signpost.

'They all want to play the star.'

A tourist watches a television on the back of a donkey

'Here's something that should suit your wooden acting style. How do you fancy playing the lead in Pinocchio?'

A pretention of playwrights

'How's this new concept? Instead of a gunfight, the hero overpowers the villian with a heartfelt homily on the sanctity of family values.'

Mega Cosmic Films. It's about a squad of ninja nuns? Yes, we call it "Force of Habit"!

Man writing at laptop says: 'It's a UK road movie ??" to give it more scale, I'm making the characters three inches tall.'

"The script isn't funny, but maybe if we put some unfunny actors in it and get an unfunny director it will be funny."

Athens Playhouse. Euclid is rehearsing a play he wrote about lust, money and lies. Investment Sales Office. Don't be obtuse! Face each other from this angle! He's a tough director. It's surprising that Euclid, the father of geometry, wrote about passion, money and deceit. I thought so too, until I read the script. It's a story about a pyramid scheme and a love triangle!

Hollywood producer.

Actor practising his indian war crys

Hollywood producer.

'You say it's a dramedy? We thought it was more of a coma.'

Ask Sadie! I just read an article where Daisy Ridley said J.J. Abrams wrote drafts for Episode VIII and Episode IX. And then Rian Johnson THREW THAT OUT and went a whole different direction. This makes me lose all faith in Star Wars. Am I overreacting? **Actual reader question. Excellent question. This reminds me of the time I saw Gone with the Wind on opening day. I was the invited guest of an elderly veteran of the Civil War. He couldn't stop yammering about how seceding from the union didn't

"It's supposed to be a comedy, so I've had Steve, here, red-flag the funny parts."

"Great money scenes!"

"I have to ask you a few questions. I've written a screenplay. Would you read it?"

'Yes, the colours are wonderful. But he only does five pages per month, and he doesn't support PostScript.'

Welcome to ARE YOU ALL RIGHT? Theatre

"He's left a suicide screenplay."

"What are they complaining about?... The local content is the audience...

Woody Allen

"I’ve gotta tell you, there’s a lot of demand for a sequel."

"You know that kid that submitted a screenplay to us on the back of a restaurant menu? I'm passing on it. I like the screenplay, but I hate that restaurant."

'It's 'big office' meets 'poorly-received flop'!'

'Oh man, every time.'

'A series based on made-up stories with actors following scripts? Preposterous.'

"And here - take this Vin Diesel monologue with you!"

Scrip Doctor

Boy at Computer.

"Just got the script from the focus group. Fabulous!"

Subtitles for the Stupid

"Sure, it's a little formulaic but I love it!"

Great script, great cinematography, great everything. But the whole 3D thing is lost on me.