Score Perfectionist T-Shirts

'I'm not asking you for a rough estimate. I want an exact number.'

"Why can't the rest of you be more like Rollins, here? He does his homework!"

Bullseye!

"Hmmm, this might just be not funny enough for The New Yorker."

'I was attracted to you but your online photo, but now that I've seen you in High-Def...'

'I told you, you were missing a decimal point.'

"I've heard of being organized, but isn't this a little obsessive compulsive?"

'Credit being what it is, I'm sure you won't mind if we see your 200,000 cattle first...'

"I'm afraid these grades aren't giving me a very satisfying vicarious life."

Is it a book? A film? A TV show? How do you mime a podcast?

Perfection

"No, I'm still getting too much banjo."

'In an inexplicable attack of nerves, Elliot becomes the first person ever to screw up John Cage's 4'33'.

"I've joined a wine-lovers club. . . so far there are only three members."

Cuts, Measurements, Certain, Sloppy

"Being happy with one's work is the kiss of death."

'I don't want to be a shepherd. I want to be the policeman who interrupts the play to tell all the mummys and daddys who have parked irresponsibly and dangerously outside to move their cars...'

"You're welcome."

'I'm a narcissist? - Are you saying I'm not perfect?'

'Excellent. But try it again and this time start your sway at the beginning of the fourth bar, O.K.?'

Christmas Present Wrapping Service.

A tailor measuring a jacket.

Desk trays - 'Do it' and 'Do it right this time'.

"For tonight's performance I have stripped everything, as far as possible, down to the "urtext" edition."

'How's the ringtone coming along, Ludwig?'

The battle of the pianos.

"Page 33, line 4..."

'This course is a great ego builder.'

Woman trying to straighten a picture of the Leaning Tower of Pisa.

"Come on, we're late. Your crosshatching looks fine."

'He was taller online!'

Cull people who talk and text during a concert you've paid good money to see.

"And on the eighth day, the Lord just puttered around..." "That cloud doesn't belong there. Did I do that? I'd better move it..."