Scientific Tinkerer Gifts

Skeleton model kit assembly instructions.

"I'm trying to cross a cow with a mule. For milk with a kick to it."

Pounding speeds up the computer.

"Young Frankenstein"

Robot Parts $5

Robots search for people's personal information in the cloud.

'My penmanship has really improved since I got a laser printer.'

The Computer Bore

"I'm grounded. I forgot to delete the car's computer history after we did those crop circles on Earth."

'First you forget logarithms. Then you forget how to do long division. Then the multiplication table begins to go...'

'What we've got here is a failure to communicate.'

"This software will cut my workload in half, so I purchased two."

Needed Inventions: An Airbag To Protect The Viewer Against A Really Lousy Program.

'You know too much,'

"If you're smart enough to design a robot to do your homework, then you're certainly smart enough to just do your homework."

Drool Marks

"Once I connect with my server over there, I can turn my lamp on and off."

Early cyborg.

Gadget geek.

"Siri, who’s the fairest of them all?"

The Not-So Smart Meter

"He's on screen saver. Just tap him."

'I solved the problem of dead zones on my cell phone with a personal satellite,'

'Hon? Did your phone go dead? Hello?'

'I think I see what's making your funny noise.'

"We do all those old tricks electronically now."

"It's a smart hamper that sucks up clothes. My mom claims I leave my clothes on the floor, so she has it follow me wherever I go."

Bicycle sat nav.

'Ugh! Another oil puddle in the living room – bad robot dog!'

'I really can't stay for dessert. Why don't you stay and DVR the rest of the date for me?'

"The man who invented autocorrect died from the corona vibrator."

'I'm no expert, but I think we're a little behind when it comes to the latest industry technology.'

"No, it's not a bug. Since you keep losing you phone, I purchased you a phone-locating drone."

'Roger's busy making a cat-flap in the kitchen.'

A man repeatedly pulls the start cord on his lawn mower until it falls apart.