Science Snack Pillows

'I'm afarid your son has all the classic elements of geekism,minus the technical expertise.'

Tartine

"Thanks to the Oscars, we're going to be the hottest finger food this season."

I'm at the shrub with the empty bag of pretzels we sniffed last week. Where are you?

'I ran out of sugar, so I used salt.'

We are shaped by what we love! Especially pizza and doughnuts!

I put a picture of my lunch on Facebook, and nobody hit "like." Who doesn't like Slim Jims and beer?

The Classy Dog: 'Dine & dance hotdogs: '50 cents a dance'.

"I'm eating baklava through my balaclava!"

Jewish Geometry

"With the prices they charge these days I can't afford to throw a pie or can off beer at the ref."

Pope tarts.

"We serve danishes because that's just how I roll!"

'Mom! Dad's eating my science fair project!'

'Kudos to Bill for the cotton candy machine idea!'

Champagne

'Mum, it's not fair: The principal said I was not allowed to take nuts to school anymore...'

"Billy, we don't need to feed that vacuum robot."

Second aid

"Why do parishioners only eat half their donuts???" "Partial indulgence."

'Why, yes, I think that's a lovely sweater, Peter... But you know the rule: no snacks unless you brought enough for the whole class.'

"That's the door to the gym, past all the snack machines."

'Alright, just this once. One, two, three, four, five...'

'Jim's blogging his thought for the day. He doesn't have any profound thoughts, he just has one thought per day.'

Studying String Cheese Theory

Happy Meals for Grown Ups

'Not beans on toast again.' - 'No, toast on beans. I dropped it.'

'The doctor said my body is 40% fat. These cookies are only 20% fat. That's got to help.'

'Beer? Wassat then?'

"Right before I die I'm going to swallow a bag of popcorn kernels."

Food van driving through an office.

'Has he been out with your mother by any chance?'

"We know you have better treats than raisins...we hacked your supermarket loyalty card."

"I don't care what your father said, Santa likes milk and cookies NOT beer and pretzels!"

An everything bagel? You call this an everything bagel?