Science Joke Collector T-Shirts

'Will this prescription interact with the meds already in my drinking water?'

"Waitress, have you smoked salmon..?"

'A burp or a fart, I can excuse, but throwing up a pellet of fur and bones? That's gross dude!'

"It's OK, I'm preordained."

'Oh man I've got a splitting headache.'

Lactose Intolerant

The Rooster Comedian.

"Would you please step back to the machine while I make an adjustment?"

Password Error: Snow White and the seven dwarfs not recognised as eight characters.

Suffering from Cooties?

'Yeah, I agree: It's hard to impress females by looking virile and strong when you're all pink...'

Job Vacancy: Human cannonball. Applicants must of the right calibre

Useless add-ons.

'Amscray,fuzzbrain - no carnivores allowed

Irritable trowel syndrome.

'Why would anyone order a pint of stoat?'

"I know my drinking limits.The problem is that I can never reach them - I simply fall down."

'Guy comes up with one interesting theory about special relativity, suddenly he thinks he's freakin' Einstein,'

"...and she said 'MOO!'"

'The funny part is that the aerial was fine -- the TV set was just unplugged!'

'Looks like somebody needs to lay off of the authentic angel food cake!'

"I must insist on my lawyer present."

'Alphabet soup? What's alphabet?'

My daddy ate my homework

Mexican Jumping Balls.

Cheating Death.

Told you...Nonsense compulsive disorder.

Shark infested custard!

"Turn your head and cough."

'What does coincide mean?' 'It's what you do when it starts to rain.'

'Take one of these three times a day until you start to feel better.'

'Yeah, I slipped on a banana skin too...'