Schoolyard Comedians Pillows

"I love a man with an untrimmed crust."

"I will not lick the principal, I will not lick the principal, I will not lick the principal, I will not lick the principal, I will not lick the principal."

"If a third grader knows the answer, how much of a problem can it really be?"

"So, what's gonna be your favorite class?"

Harry Potter learns some 'new tricks' on his first day enrolled in a public school.

'Right, who threw that?' (giant pupil in class).

'I made a good grade in creative writing, but I didn't do very well in creative spelling.'

"I lost my taste for his homework when it came burned on a CD."

"I flunked out of cooking school. Even the dog won't eat my homework."

"Where were you between 4 and 6?"

Monitor lizard becomes milk monitor.

The Ekert Saga: 'Ah, another week of school begins...might as well try to make the most of it!...You're crampin' my style, Ekert.'

"Where are redactions when you need them?"

'School was really exciting today -- they busted up a meth lab in chemistry class.'

'Hi Dad. I want you to meet Mr. Hacketal, my attorney.'

"Some school - They teach us about the Fifth Amendment, but they won't let us use it on TESTS!"

"A simple note from your mother would have sufficed, Tommy."

"I'm the Class Clown fish."

'Ms. Blumter, please get me a copy of Educational Leadership for Dummies.'

"I DO have a note from my doctor...but nobody can read it!"

'I thought chemistry experiments were after lunch.'

'I would love to run for class president, but I'm concerned about the vetting process. I once faked sleep during nap time in pre-school.'

"The first week of school is just review. You know. Scenes from last year's episode."

"I thought those D's meant dedicated!"

'This will be tough. The parents can handle Bs and Cs, but I really gotta spin this D in math.'

'I think the computer has a crush on me. It asked me to remain after class.'

'We can't get rid of her - she has tenure.'

'Did anyone tell her we're from another planet?'

'Division is just like addition except you have to use a different button on the calculator.'

'It's in case I need a laugh track.'

"We're having a make up test at school. Can I borrow your mascara?"

"I can count to 20...Without taking off my shoes."

Welcome to algebra. As freshmen, you are the unknown variable X. After 32 years, I ask myself Y?

'I figured if 1 is good for milk, why not schoolwork, too?'

"A laser blaster turns pesky little boys into ferns! Now that would be a cool school supply."