School Pride Promoter Gifts

"Just principal will suffice, Ed."

We need a new eco project. Ok. Let's get locally grown food into the school cafeteria. What's our strategy? We can start with the potatoes. I'll make the poster. We want home fries.

A man peddles U.S. flags on the sidewalk, next to a man peddling copies of the U.S. constitution

Rejected Titles For The Canadian National Anthem.

'Smashing party, Miss - can we have another one tomorrow?'

"I guess it took a pandemic to make me realize school is better than trying to learn stuff online."

'It's a tough call but I'm going to side with your parents, if for no other reason, because they can sue and you can't.'

"So, hw ws yr smmr?"

'Jerry's 'old school'.'

'Thank you for the apple Conrad. But in answer to your question, no, you may not address me as 'Boopsie'.'

'I told you hard work would pay off in the third grade, Cate...You've had three job offers.'

'Tommy's doing fine. I'm concerned about your poor fund-raising record. You sold only two magazine subscriptions and one measly candy bar.'

“Today we are going to be learning percentages.”

'146 days of leadership without any negative press.'

"She's the best nit nurse this school has ever seen."

'Oooh, Jimmy, the teacher put another throwing star on your paper! Great!'

'Quit fooling around, Gog. Do the assignment.'

You Are Now Entering Texas Think Big

"I'm the last to go home because my parents are still fine tuning their work-life balance."

Patey's in a band! He's so cool!

'Do you have any of those cars with 'My Child Is An Honor Student' bumper stickers on them?'

'Ms. Shelby, I think you're spinning out of control.'

Highschool sign.

'Well, when you mess up on the job, you know where you stand with me.'

'Uruguayan? - No, he's from Scotland.'

"Don’t worry. You’re looking at the Frederick H. Tuttle Middle School long-jump champion."

"Well, Timmy's academic results show that he has an exceptional instinct, well above the standard "basic instinct"..."

We pride ourselves on having every type of insurance policy, but report card insurance is a new one to us.

Minnesota Weather.

'It's someone from the Society for Ethical Treatment of Principals asking for a donation.'

'Boasting bumper stickers.'

"But first, our national anthem."

'If the key to effective classroom management is consistency, I guess I'm an effective classroom manager, I am consistently exhausted at the end of the day.'

Kid to class: 'I'll read my book report in a minute, but first, a word about our underpaid teachers ...'

"Let's have refreshments on parents' night. These people need nourishment."