School Misfit Humorist Pillows

'I don't understand: Everyone stopped when I joined the food-fight at school...'

"I will not lick the principal, I will not lick the principal, I will not lick the principal, I will not lick the principal, I will not lick the principal."

"If a third grader knows the answer, how much of a problem can it really be?"

"So, what's gonna be your favorite class?"

"Check it out! In nature, females are in charge...they select their mates!"

'Right, who threw that?' (giant pupil in class).

"I lost my taste for his homework when it came burned on a CD."

What do MD and PHD mean? It means the doctor owes a lot of money in student loans.

"I flunked out of cooking school. Even the dog won't eat my homework."

"Where were you between 4 and 6?"

'In Show and Tell today, I showed my birthmark! I got expelled!'

"I'm sorry. I don't have yours. My dog ate your homework."

'The reason the core curriculum seems so ambiguous is that we dot really have a core curriculum.'

'You're flunking me? -- What about the statute of limitations?'

"I'm the Class Clown fish."

'Hi Dad. I want you to meet Mr. Hacketal, my attorney.'

'School was really exciting today -- they busted up a meth lab in chemistry class.'

Monitor lizard becomes milk monitor.

"A simple note from your mother would have sufficed, Tommy."

"Some school - They teach us about the Fifth Amendment, but they won't let us use it on TESTS!"

'I have answers to the kind of questions no one likes to ask.'

"I think the teacher who says that I got into trouble today is part of the fake news conspiracy."

'Ms. Blumter, please get me a copy of Educational Leadership for Dummies.'

"I DO have a note from my doctor...but nobody can read it!"

'I thought chemistry experiments were after lunch.'

'I don't think much to faith school dinners.'

'I would love to run for class president, but I'm concerned about the vetting process. I once faked sleep during nap time in pre-school.'

"The principal has sat in on so many of my classes, I'm thinking of giving him the exam."

'I think the computer has a crush on me. It asked me to remain after class.'

'This will be tough. The parents can handle Bs and Cs, but I really gotta spin this D in math.'

"I thought those D's meant dedicated!"

"... And don't come back until you're ready to get funny."

'We can't get rid of her - she has tenure.'

'The dog won't eat my homework.'

'Division is just like addition except you have to use a different button on the calculator.'