School Lunch Mastermind Gifts

Schoolboy with lunch box.

"All dishes marked with an asterisk are served with sarcasm. . ."

'This is a business lunch, Lowden. So, don't even think about enjoying yourself.'

Gone to lunch back in 10 mins.

"At least the anti-public education folks haven't started to try to dictate what we can have for lunch."

"The biggest mystery in my life is whether I get a peanut butter and jelly or a tuna fish sandwich!"

'They sent me home from school because my lunch was out of compliance.'

'As if school lunches weren't bad enough. Now, they have to be nutritious!'

'Casey laughed so hard at lunch milk came out his nose...or as we say now... he had a liquid food malfunction.'

"This means that dad is climbing Everest with my cheese and pickle sandwich."

"I didn't know they could make so many entrees with vegetables!"

Schoolgirl in canteen: 'The food's great but I wish they'd stop calling it 'pukka tukka'.'

"It's just that I would be more thankful if we had roast beef."

'I'll trade you, sight unseen.'

"She said this is not the same old alphabet soup, this one has a new font."

'What's intravenous feeding? My mom says if I don't eat my vegetables, she'd do that to me!'

"Our food supervisor used to be a military cook."

"Ever since we started home schooling, I've developed more of an appreciation for school lunches."

"Don't forget... I packed your lunch for school..."

"Can I have a standard lunch bag please Mum? They make fun of me at school when I eat out of my nose bag..."

"I love math! I love spelling! I love school lunches!"

Pink slime hot dogs.

"Talk about cruel and unusual punishment!"

"Baldo, you promised to never bring up the subject of buying a car during mealtime."

"I won't miss Michelle Obama."

Cats prefer the food that people eat.

"In the kitchen preparation is everything. Here's one I prepared earlier, & here's one I prepared even earlier."

'I always take my lunch on fish stick day.'

"I don't understand my mom! She packed me two lunches like I'm the world's biggest eater!"

"Honestly, I don't know how I cooked all those years before I got the husband gate."

'Well of course the custard's lumpy...it's got garlic in it.'

'Oh, that is the businessman's lunch, sir -- 'lean and mean.''

"And would the gentlemen like a table with a fax or without?"

"Did your mom commandeer your lunch account again?"

"When I said I didn't mind you having lunch at your desk, I was thinking of a light snack."