School Day Strategists T-Shirts

'If the school can send in substitute teachers, how come we can't send in substitute students?'

Computer Room.

School. Report Card. You couldn't name the presidents and flunked history? Yeah -- It's not what you know, it's who you know.

'I appreciate how you feel, but I'm afraid your report card isn't grounds for defamation of character.

'No! Forging a note from your parents does not count as creative writing!'

"By reading my note, you acknowledge having read and agreed to my Privacy Policy and Terms of Use."

'Not just my homework - The dog chewed up my whole LAPTOP!'

"Maybe if I make myself inconspicuous I won't be called on."

"Getting into a fight is one thing, but did you have to get into a class-clearing brawl?"

Will eat your homework for $.

'Can I hand in my report tomorrow. Ms. D'Amato? I haven't finished reading the book. I've been too busy coloring it.'

"If animals can be cloned, why can't homework be cloned?"

"In my class, I'm not interested in grades. I'm interested in you becoming a better person!"

'It wouldn't be right if I did your homework for you!' 'At least you could try!'

'Mum, it's not fair: The principal said I was not allowed to take nuts to school anymore...'

Educators push back against politically motivated school opening proposals."

"All right, what's it going to take to make this homework go away?"

Walking To School Simulator

"We were running late, so my mom faxed me to school."

"What I should have done during vacation besides watching video games. . ."

'You're being evacuated to a better catchment area.'

'...All profits are local.'

'Stewart, why is the handwriting on your mom's last two attendance notes different?'

'That's the bell for round two.'

'First she called my mother, and then she called Santa.'

'To be honest I only became a vicar to get my children into the C of E school.'

2000 words was tough, but doable. Billy would play the picture paints a 1000 words card, twice!

"Mom, no more apples for teacher. It looks like bribery."

'I don't know what made Ms. Doan think I was running in the hall.'

'I don't have a dog, but I do have a dog app that eats my homework.'

"Homework is work, and work without breaks is a federal offense that can be reported to the labor board."

"I try to get a head start on them."

Soccer Moms

'No sir, we're not boarding a flight. My teacher just needs to check my homework in my my dog Sam here, if it wouldn't be too much trouble.'

'So, you see, Dad, if we compare our overall school performance, I'm actually doing better than you did at my age.'