Back-to-school Strategist T-Shirts

"Well... just 5 days, 16 hours and 30 minutes till school starts."

"It's how she gets ready for the end of summer."

Educators push back against politically motivated school opening proposals."

School. Report Card. You couldn't name the presidents and flunked history? Yeah -- It's not what you know, it's who you know.

'I appreciate how you feel, but I'm afraid your report card isn't grounds for defamation of character.

'No! Forging a note from your parents does not count as creative writing!'

'Your classroom management techniques work in practice but not in theory. That worries me.'

"By reading my note, you acknowledge having read and agreed to my Privacy Policy and Terms of Use."

'Not just my homework - The dog chewed up my whole LAPTOP!'

"Maybe if I make myself inconspicuous I won't be called on."

"Getting into a fight is one thing, but did you have to get into a class-clearing brawl?"

Will eat your homework for $.

"If animals can be cloned, why can't homework be cloned?"

"In my class, I'm not interested in grades. I'm interested in you becoming a better person!"

'It wouldn't be right if I did your homework for you!' 'At least you could try!'

Walking To School Simulator

"All right, what's it going to take to make this homework go away?"

"We were running late, so my mom faxed me to school."

"I can always tell when the kids go back to school. Everyone is so happy and relaxed."

'That's the bell for round two.'

"What I should have done during vacation besides watching video games. . ."

'You're being evacuated to a better catchment area.'

Welcome to Kindergarten. It's a list of school supplies -- I need pencils, a ruler, crayons and a laptop!

'First she called my mother, and then she called Santa.'

'To be honest I only became a vicar to get my children into the C of E school.'

'...All profits are local.'

'Stewart, why is the handwriting on your mom's last two attendance notes different?'

2000 words was tough, but doable. Billy would play the picture paints a 1000 words card, twice!

'I don't have a dog, but I do have a dog app that eats my homework.'

"Mom, no more apples for teacher. It looks like bribery."

'I don't know what made Ms. Doan think I was running in the hall.'

"This year, I'm starting school with a positive attitude! You have my word...I'm waiting till the second week of school to call it the worst year of my life."

Kid sheltering from rain inside a vault box.

'No sir, we're not boarding a flight. My teacher just needs to check my homework in my my dog Sam here, if it wouldn't be too much trouble.'

"Homework is work, and work without breaks is a federal offense that can be reported to the labor board."