
Teacher removes 'School Paper' sign and replaces it with 'School Blog' sign.
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Teacher removes 'School Paper' sign and replaces it with 'School Blog' sign.
Hey, calm down --- Now, what did you say again?
"I don't believe I've missed a single sign since you made the switch to Power Point."
'Complete sentences?? Jeez, how verbose can you get?'
"Look, he just wants to apologize for scaring the daylights out of you yesterday. ... Mr. Squirrel? ..."
A family with mustaches talking on their cellphones.
"We evolved from asteroids"
"My Blackberry will get in touch with your Blackberry."
'This is a letter opener, from the days before faxes and email. I just sold it online after I listed it as a vintage communication device.'
Oh, no
"I've been listening to your podcast. And though I agree with your opinion on deforestation and global warming, I strongly disagree with your claim that I overcook my pasta."
"If we evolved from stupid people, why are there stupid people still around?"
The Church of DanaeDanaeism: 'And let such sacrilege go uncontested? Never! I demand equal time for alternate explanations of things.'
"Abbreviations here, abbreviations there, and one is more incomprehensible than the next!"
The next wave
A mathematical question for you. Do we divide or multiply?
"Grandpa's not tech savvy. If I want to unfriend someone, I say, 'I don't like you anymore' to their face."
"I'm going to need more minutes. I'm texting for two now!"
"Hmm. . . Human droppings. . .!"
Climate Conference. I'm glad you enjoyed my speech, but please don't call it the "high-water mark."
"Janet, please. I'm calling the vet's office to check their lost and found. That's the last place I saw my nuts."
'And the actual value of the Hubble Constant is critical to the question or whether our Universe will continue to expand forever, or...POP.'
'Now we'll have to explain it to the press. Remember - keep it superficial.'
'Charles is a linguist. He speaks three language...golf, baseball and football.'
I hate it when the moon shows his dark side...
"I'm not great at communication, but my little buddy is."
When Farmer Harry Met Farmer Sally.
When it comes to texting, she's all thumbs.'
Person talks on phone as other blogs.
'That line means good managerial skills!'
"Moses, it's your mother. It's the only way I could get hold of you. You never call."
"Hi, it's me. My mum's confiscated my mobile." (Kid talks to friend using margarine tub and string).
'With government cyber snooping, we must communicate through channels no one would ever suspect...the postal service.'
'I wonder if TED ever listens.'
Research Concludes: We are destroying Earth.
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