Scholar In Arms Pillows

Academia Can Kill By Degrees

Bob encounters one of the bugs in the Jean Paul Sartre fan website.

"Finally, after years of work, irrefutable proof that I'm a nerd."

Academic Jeopardy ... 'What Was the Maiden Name of Dante Alighieri's Maternal Grandmother?'

The Bookworm

"I had all the right answers, but I had them in the wrong order."

William Shakespeare a.k.a. Francis Bacon, Earl of Essex....

'I asked Will if he wrote it. He said he wasn't sure.'

"Maybe he's so sad that he's leaving us to go to college that he actually looks happy. Please don't ruin it for me with reality."

"I think you'll find the pen is writier than the sword."

"This is a test. This is only a test. IF this had been the real world it'd be your job you'd be fighting for, not a letter of the alphabet."

The Last upper: Novus Ordo Style

"Must be another paradigm shift."

"Have you been working out?"

Chicken soup for the adjunct professors soul

Wikipedia...

"An excellent defense. Let's give her the doctorate."

'Read that last part back to me.'

So, that's bipedalism? It doesn't look very ergonomic.

"Before you grade my test, keep in mind, my dream is to become a wealthy doctor, just like my available father"

Too big to fail

"Fifty years in academia, studying, researching, writing and teaching. And what do they call me? ‘The Human AI’."

The Giamatti era

Professor McWit, Didn't Publish, So Perished.

"I'm thinking that now is a good time to start those tutoring sessions."

'Thirty years in academia and all I got was this chair.'

"I don't know why we try so hard to get the right answers. There isn't even a prize."

To monk showing book entitled 'Brand Spanking New Testament': "I think we may have to shorten the title."

"Quit your whining... Someday you'll appreciate affordable student housing."

"Mission 66.666% accomplished."

Petrarch

"Ted doesn't test well."

"It's badly sprained, McElroy, and you know as well as I do that I'd only slow you down. Go on without me—and that's a direct order!"

"Mr Newton, we have carefully reviewed your work in alchemy and have come to one conclusion: stick to physics.'

'What makes me mad, I was only a couple seats away from all the right answers!'