Scent-free Advocate T-Shirts

Woman throwing away smoking accessories

Polluted geese

Santa Claus's wife beats the soot out of his beard.

Politically Correct Snowperson

All Natural Nothing

"All of tonight's specials dance around the whole GMO thing."

"Smokey The Tree"

"This is locally grown and good for the environment, but it may give you greenhouse gas."

'I just finished the floors, so they better stay clean!'

'Our health-care system - eat organically.'

'Swimming is the healthiest sport. . . Because it's the only one where you can't smoke while you're doing it.'

'Cleanliness is next to 'clean room' in the dictionary. Look it up.'

"Before you go anywhere, did you lick behind your ears?"

'I trust this is a non-smoking uterus!'

'Make it a microbrew, Jake! I've gone organic!'

'I know my instruments are sterilized every day but I have no idea who does it.'

Snowman has twisted, wonky carrot nose: 'Apparently, it's organic.'

"Tempting, but I'm on a plastic cleanse this week."

'Be careful...It may not be organic.'

'A word of advice, the squeaky wheel gets the totally organic, 0 trans-fat, soy-based lubricant.'

Drug Testing Unit: 'Uh Oh!'

"Some day, son, all this will be yours. Sorry."

'Is it organic?'

In the art gallery

Heart Disease Menu

'...Contains Phixe-knide, TBHQ, hydro-cla, Cyklid, Yetfopnmide - and other unpronounceable stuff.' (grocery store)

"Smoking or nonsmoking?"

'No we didn't get high definition TV - the wife dusted the screen.'

Pollution Look

"Come on, honey, try just one Goliath pea. It's organic, locally grown, and GMO free."

'You're going to have to stop smoking, drink less, change your eating habits and start taking regular exercise.' 'This seems awfy one-sided, Doctor.'

"Sorry, but it is not negotiable! You have to let Tim clean your teeth twice a day!"

Which is the genetically modified corn?"

'I'm defragging my wardrobe.'

"Tomorrow, we'll take on the tobacco industry."