Savings Warrior Gifts

Pig Bank Hammer

"Work hard. Save money. Work hard. Save money. Work hard. Save money. Work hard. Save money. Yay!!! I died rich!"

"We were able to retire 6 years early by canceling cable & eliminating anything fun."

'If only I'd spent as much time on my investment portfolio as I did on my lolly mix when I was a kid.'

Piggy bank #6: Union Jack.

"This statement from your headmaster says that you can easily get a good degree...your bank manager says you can't."

"Gas. Regular. Premium. Super. You don’t want to know."

"The only thing that's not gone up is the pound."

Investing your savings

"Forget the allowance - I need a benefactor!"

Roasting the Moneybox

"I'm on a tight budget. Make it look like I cut at myself."

'Greenspan said today the alert staus for the possible interest rate has been reduced from orange to yellow.'

Lemonade - $500 A Glass! 'Yes, my prices high, but how else am I supposed to buy a Boulevart M109R? Certainly not on my allowance.'

'As you go through life, always remember that money isn't everything...Health benefits and stock options are also very important.'

"It failed the stress test."

"You never actually own a pension pot - you merely look after it for the next government."

"The time has come for some tough cost-cutting decisions, and I'm forced to ask myself, do we really need a bass?"

'My piggy bank charged shaking fees.'

Man breaks piggy bank to find another smaller piggy bank inside.

"Good news. Your medical prognosis is right in sync with your retirement portfolio."

"If we take a late retirement and an early death, we'll just squeak by."

'Our new simplified energy bills just have a few options starting with 'Grossly inflated' and progressing to the premium 'Bloodsucker' package. . .'

"Want to trade banks with me?"

'The sick economy isn't why J.B.has cut back on spending. He always was a tightwad.'

Man feeding fish banks with money, not food.

Welcome all to the monthly gathering of Tightwads United. Hi there. Hello. Hey. On tonight's agenda: Dumpster diving, coupon clipping, and a special lecture. How to carpool while always getting the other person to drive. I'm like a god. Woohoo!! Yeah!!! Clap clap clap clap clap clap clap. Tightwads United.

"And this financial plan is specifically designed for people who know their retirement -- IF they get one -- won't be half as good as their parents' retirement, and are really steamed about it!"

"We got the cactus account!"

'It may seem we're sinking deeper into debt, but really we're just experiencing a quarter of negative growth.'

'Are you good with decimals? Our certificate of deposit is currently paying 0.025%.'

I've managed to get your tax bill down to zero, this year ... however, my bill is $10 million.

'Damn! I was saving that for a rainy day!'

'Getting back into the market can be stressful. I recommend a portfolio heavy on sleep-aids, tranquilizers, and antacids.'

"I think it's time we cashed in our spare change. We could probably pay off our house."