Saving Star Gifts

'He's learning how to maintain a bank account.'

"Work hard. Save money. Work hard. Save money. Work hard. Save money. Work hard. Save money. Yay!!! I died rich!"

Rare earths are the key to a greenwashed, technotopian future

'Me, I don't spend my pocket money: I hoard it...'

"Son, you're old enough now for The Talk: everything you need to know about compound interest."

'But Dad, all the other kids get a roth IRA as part of their allowance package.'

"We were able to retire 6 years early by canceling cable & eliminating anything fun."

Squirrel putting nuts in a safe box.

'If only I'd spent as much time on my investment portfolio as I did on my lolly mix when I was a kid.'

Piggy bank #6: Union Jack.

Thrift: have your arms and legs amputated, use a pillow for a bed!

"What the... mine are lunar eclipse glasses!"

'Do you think we should tell anyone about this?'

"I'm teaching him to rollover my 401 (k)."

Evolution.

"What a tragedy... he still had two years of his super left..."

Investing your savings

Piggy bank #5: carrying (colour).

"Forget the allowance - I need a benefactor!"

Roasting the Moneybox

'And this is my strategic money reserve.'

'My allowance isn't much - but I have a great benefits package!'

"Gee, thanks! What rate of interest does it pay?"

Saving for College.

'This is where I keep my investment portfolio.'

'You keep outliving your old-age retirement savings!'

"Dad, wouldn't my allowance be better off earning interest in a tax free municipal bond fund?"

'Can you loan me *** till pay day?'

'Of course I'm squirreling away money!'

'Looks like we'll have to break into the piggy bank to find our endowment funding.'

"It failed the stress test."

"We've decided to diversify our funds on some candy!"

Leaf Thinks: 'At times like this I'm happy to have a green job.'

"I don't have time for piggy banks. Can't I just buy an ATM?"

"I came to save you, but everything I can think to do seems like it wouldn't actually make that much of a difference."