Sauna Seekers Gifts

"I'll never understand why grownups would pay to take a bath."

'Before I order breakfast, which way is it to the 'International Bathroom of Pancakes'?'

Frog in the puddles.

Protest

'You obviously took my suggestion to reduce stress to the extreme.'

-...And we don't discriminate against people of colour. -I've been on the sunbed!

'That's our Rex - he loves to dog paddle.'

'Nobody minds if I take the ocean view suite with complimentary champagne and Sven, the in-room Swedish masseur, do they?'

'Have you had a brazilian?'

Do you think room service could bring me an ice lolly?

Hombre's Best Friend.

Ultimately, the teachers union agreed to a lesser pay increase in exchange for a full-time massage therapist in the faculty lounge.

'Who would have thought there was a market for it? We're going to be rich George!...'

There's a popular new health spa down there. The endorphins are having a blast in aerobics. Antibodies are learning kickboxing and the adrenaline is getting some much needed relaxation in the yoga studio. The only problem is the water molecules. Everybody is concerned about them! What's wrong? They haven't been seen since they went into the sauna!

Towny Music Night.

Sea Horse outside saloon

Complete Makeover

"Today we can help herd cattle, go on a nature hike, get a sauna and massage, or go into town and rob the bank."

'I really don't care about your work/life balance.'

'-and we offer trauma counselling at no extra cost!'

'Here you are Dear, here's a fiver. Go in there and have them make you look like a million dollars.'

"Well, that's that, Henry. Let's go over to the Four Seasons and towel off."

Tips on how to reduce those unsightly crow's feet.

"Couldn't you have waited till she was smiling before you injected the botox?"

Being Pampered.

"I'm Walter Grimes and I approve this drink."

Death takes a holiday.

'The old one fell apart.'

"The public seems concerned about the size of government."

DIY pedicure

'Yeah, I'm a trife scorpio - what of it?'

"I'm for getting away from it all but Harry always brings it all with him."

"Ed is back from his silent cocoon retreat."

'Do you want it set for light, medium or butterball?'

'-and we offer trauma counselling at no extra cost!'