Satirical Points Seekers Gifts

'We'd like to go to a country not under threat of US attack for having a nuclear weapons program.'

"On a more positive note the guidance we’ve published on the services we can’t provide is published in 37 different languages."

''...And defend the Constitution of the United States.' -- And now, I'd like to pardon the following Illinois politicians....'

King Kong uses fly spray against the pesky planes on top of the Empire State Building

"Waiter! Two of your finest menus!"

"Quick! Act like we just developed a drug that they can sell for seven thousand dollars a pill."

'Now they're just taking the piss.'

Meet the Enemy

"I'm in a catch-23 situation."

Flyfishing for dummies.

'Oh don't listen to him! Norman wasn't a motivational guru... he was just that cat in those silly 'hang in there' posters.'

"I'm weighed down with so many gadgets, I'll need a push to start me off."

"Pardon me, Vito, but I'm holding the talking stick now."

'Amscray,fuzzbrain - no carnivores allowed

'Too late...looks like they've already been pillaged.'

Censors 'no' a good thing when they see it.

And here's the office floor plan. The numbers indicate the recommended sequence in which to step on people on your way to the top.

'Stick them up...'

'I know how much you like holding hands, so I brought you a box of them..'

"Uh Oh! Jehovah's"

'It was going well - until his power suit short-circuited.'

Coronavirus Waves

'I'd like my £2.50 back'

Overshadowed by the Tony's: Broadway's Lesser Known Awards

The signing of Ben Franklin's non-disclosure agreement.

"Another flue shot, Larry.

"Beware of the frog"

Quality Control

"Dammit all, haven't they heard of e-mail?"

"Picasso: Post cataract surgery."