Satirical Humor Seeker Pillows

"Great. You move to Mexico, and we all end up working at McDonald's."

"I'll have whatever is hot, fast, and artisanal."

A Crematorium worker is caught out preparing a chicken and vegetables for roasting in the Cremating oven

'My investment advice is to relax, stop and smell the roses, dig up the roses, bury a million dollars beneath the roses.'

"It's always poor you, isn't it, Albert?"

Masters of the Electoral College

"Don't worry: We're turning the corner."

Pop-up Book of Missiles

'As the House Speaker, Rep. Boehner, do you have any other words in your vocabulary besides 'No'?!'

John Dryden

Polite discourse in the 2020's

"On a more positive note the guidance we’ve published on the services we can’t provide is published in 37 different languages."

"And when the canyon fills up, that's it; herd immunity."

Mike (The Situation) is rumored to have written the original manuscript for his best-selling memoir entirely out of bronzer.

''...And defend the Constitution of the United States.' -- And now, I'd like to pardon the following Illinois politicians....'

...and then I...wait....What's that?? Whoa! We're on a spaceship! This is fun! Hey! What's this button do? Can I pull this lever? Are we there yet? Take a selfie with us? Do we get snacks? Can I drive? Are we there yet? Something we said? Just imagine if we'd been obnoxious!

Invasion Of The Summer Aliens

Due to his low center of gravity, Jake is the greatesr broncbuster ever!

'Fetch.'

ACME INDUSTRIES NEW PRODUCTS DIVISION, 'The best part is, it can repossess itself!'

'Hold on just a few more minutes. I want mine medium well.'

Sounds that various toys make when they are vacuumed up.

A sheep dog has stacked the sheep four high - 'He used to be with the circus before he came to the farm...!'

The Runaway Horse

King Kong uses fly spray against the pesky planes on top of the Empire State Building

Giraffe Umbrella

'Been Away?' A piece of bread looks at a piece of brown toast as if it's got a suntan.

Transylvanian backpackers.

"Don't worry, Ref, just shock, it's his first save all season."

"I wrote this next song about my cat. It's called 'Please stop rubbing your face against my computer screen when I'm trying to watch Narcos.'"

"Waiter! Two of your finest menus!"

Figures from 'Ascent of Man' diagram all do the Conga: 'Let's all fo the Conga, na-na-na-na ...'

"Well how about that. . . Lady Godiva bought a Harley!"

"Four years of dental school only to tell all my patients 'Don't worry about any tooth issues - they'll just fall out and be replaced, anyway'."

A caveman paints from life