Sarcastic Birthday Celebrator Gifts

'great win, kids! Let's celebrate... My treat!!'

'I couldn't remember your exact age.'

"Don't think of this birthday as you're getting older. Think of it as being one day closer to irritable bowel syndrome."

"I'm not going to do any work...cos it's my birthday!"

Happy Bifurcation Day,

"I thought we agreed that the dining room was a buffer zone."

"Happy Birthday - I saw this and thought of you."

"Happy new year!"

A woman stares at a birthday cake that has "4,000,000 calories" written on top of it in icing.

Knights

Celebrate National Submarine Day.

'If there was one thing Methusela hated. It was his Birthday bumps.

"Then maybe you should just tell me what you want for your birthday instead of saying you don't care."

The first birthday gift.

"Meanwhile at Oak Vista Rest Home... In case of birthday cake fire break glass."

'That does it! I've had it with that nincompoop! Every time there's a birthday, he's the first to sign the card and he never leaves room for anyone else!'

Life begins at 60

The Big Bad Wolf Turns 50.

'I do hope you enjoy your birthday lie-in, dear.'

'It's nice to see you all,but I was just going out to work.'

'Born again birthdays don't count.'

'Medical researchers discovered that the leading cause of death by aging is due to birthdays.'

Man holding a birthday cake.

Handel sitting on a piano

A drum covered in candles

'I must be getting older, the cards joking about my age just don't seem as funny anymore'