Sandal Enthusiast T-Shirts

'Ooooh, convertible!'

Summer feet.

Summer 2000: Children stumble upon the remains of Linda Tripp's old head.

'Do you think that's wise?'

Shoe addict.

The prophet who changed water into diet grapefruit soda.

"Your assumption that a one in a million chance event MUST be a miracle shows you drastically underestimate the total number of regularly occurring events."

The Alpha Seltzer

'Hang on a second, I think I have a sand castle in my shoe.'

'How about joining us for a soda and pizza after the ceremony?'

The signing of Ben Franklin's non-disclosure agreement.

'I was hounded out of office!', 'That explains the smell.'

Fifty shades of Leveson.

"A trillion bottles of beer on the wall, a trillion bottles of beer..."

"City kids."

"Ooo... she sounds nice... 'I enjoy burying myself in the sand and sideways walks on the beach.'"

Dept of Probability: Maybe, Possibly, Perhaps.

"Maps to stars' rehab centers."

"It's running five minutes fast."

"What's the best way to break up a marriage?"

"Wait, I've got sand in my shoe."

"We're going public with our stock AND your philandering."

"Sir, your new campaign manager is here."

"This one has nicer sand, but I think I prefer the tree on the last one we saw."

'This tuna is being recalled. It contains seahorse.'

"What are you thinking of, Dear?" "Oh just something I said to Robert Mueller."

Evolution into a pair of sandals.

Trumpled

'I want a scurrilous biography. If it was good enough for Getty, it will be good enough for me.'

"Ain't no denying it son. It's a genuine fact that the surfers rule."