Sales Professionals T-Shirts

It turns out people aren't buying our product because it's stupid.

Crazy Ed's Warehouse - body in freezer - "Nobody beats our prices and gets away with it."

'I can't save your husband, but I can save you 20%!'

"I want you to come up with a new word to define 'profits'."

Telsa Sales

Retailers Tech Expo. A customer just passed a card with an embedded chip by the sensor to complete the purchase! They wave goodbye to their money!

'We must grasp this new opportunity'

'The plan was idiot-proof. Unfortunately, someone came up with a superior idiot.'

Confident Business Team - We Know We Can

With the aid of a tactical dictionary, and was finally able to make sense of what the salesman was saying.

"And right here is where we got jiggy with it."

'It's only a hunch, but I think everybody bought everything they needed, last time.'

"So the plan is to fly everyone for free. But we'll charge $400.00 per bag."

'I think you are taking this elevator pitch way too literally'.

"Here's what I'm gonna do."

"Well, ordinary men have colleagues. Successful men have victims."

Larry's used art

'When we get there let me do the double talking.'

'Our product flooded the market... Before backing up a deluge of consumer complaints!'

'I should not that the cherry and whipped cream were an afterthought created by our graphics dept.'

"The data looks good, sir, but the vibes are mucho heavioso."

Two children are running lemonade stands outside their home; one stand is more popular than the other.

'Quick! We need a bigger chart in here!'

"In recognition of last month's little upward blip, I suggest we allow ourselves a spontaneous victory fist bump."

"Now here's one that has the glamour above the table."

'The efficiency expert's recommendation is we drink more coffee!'

'I vote we hang the darn thing upside down and go home!'

"Now that I have everyone's attention..."

ACME INDUSTRIES NEW PRODUCTS DIVISION, 'The best part is, it can repossess itself!'

"It's kohlrabi, the next hot vegetable."

"So, I see you have a background in advertising..."

'This is a 'placebo' line. It serves no purpose but it makes us feel good.'

"Great! We're still going up! Chop a hole in the ceiling!"

"Thanks for walking a mile in my shoe but it's beginning to hurt now."

"Unfortunately, the consumer was not as demanding as we had hoped."