Salary Secrecy Aficionado Gifts

'We have a strict don't-ask-don't-tell policy for salaries.'

"Another week another dollar, Jenkins"

'Are you picky about preferring something with a livable wage?'

'Was my salary expectation a bit too high?'

Top Secret - Destroy before reading.

'What a day! Caught between a Wiki leak and a document dump.'

'What would you say to a salary increase?'

"Rest assured, anything you say in this office won't get repeated by me."

"My strength is as the strength of ten, because I'm rich."

Top Secret Files

'Don't you ever get tired of all the whispering?'

"He was expecting a golden handshake."

Secret Identity Theft.

"I never discuss my clients with their mothers."

After income tax, pension and national insurance I end up owing £450.

We try to keep our jam making expertise quiet!

'Actually, Carruthers, if you take the world average income, you're grossly overpaid.'

"Personally I don't think our salaries are too high - I see them as legitimate compensation for the emotional trauma we suffer due to the public's disdain for our high salaries."

"Business has been so good that I can now pay you a salary...mom!"

'Its going to be difficult to replace you. Especially on the salary we were paying.'

Government "Information" Agency.

'The firm provides every new executive with a personal trainer.'

"There are two reasons I'd never tell anyone what you told me today... First, because of the principal of confidentiality and second because it was very boring."

'We will never divulge your personal data unless you ask us not to.'

Shred-a Data - We shred into much smaller pieces.

'It doesn't bother me that I don't know what I'm doing. I'm paid vast amounts of money.'

"Does the job hold many challenges?"

Why Creatures Of The Night Don't Wear Corduroy

"We don't disclose what we pay until you sign a contract committing to work for us for a year."

'Aah! I didn't see you come in Mr. Brown - well done! You can start Monday!'

'When I asked 'whether you thought you could bring the team with you'? I didn't mean to our preliminary confidential off-the-record exploratory chat!'

"For the first year, you get a cost-of-living raise every three months. Then, you hit the donut hole."

How to put a pitcher under pressure.

'I know it's a boring make-work job but I like it because it's a make-salary job.'

"You're hired, starting pay is twenty bucks an hour, later it can go up to thirty."