Salad Specialist Pillows

"May I take your plate or are you still nibbling?"

"We're checking ourselves out after making our own salads and grinding our own coffee...they should be paying us!"

'Like death by salad.'

"It comes with a small Greek salad."

"The salad should be delicious. We ordered it with lots of extra bacon bits."

"Waiter, there's a hare in my salad!"

Surprise in the salad bowl

'Preparing rocket salad isn't domestic science, ladies.'

'I realize it's not on the menu but I'm on a diet and I'd like an air fern salad.'

Mrs. Robot attempts to improve her family's diet.

'Thank you waiter - my wife's the rabbit.'

Cinema with a salad bar in its lobby.

"More croutons, sir?"

"Oh No!!!...Cap'n...Iceberg...Dead ahead!!"

"Waiter, can you find out if this hair in my arugula salad is locally harvested?"

Free salad bar.

Ranch Dressing

"We only do salads. There's no need to keep warning customers that the plates are cold."

"I'll just have a small salad. . . say 400 pounds of fresh river vegetation."

'If a tomato is a fruit, why don't you get it in fruit salad?'

'You're eating too much roughage.'

"I'm pleased to say our dishes all have too much kale."

"Good morning, Mother! We made you a desk salad."

"Might I recommend one of our salads? They come with three of your companion's fries."

'No - we really don't cater for vegans, even our salad dressing is made from sperm oil!'

"Who is having the 4 bean salad? Half portion?"

The Perfect Garden.

I can't believe I ate all that kale for nothing.

'Boy, when they say one trip salad bar, they MEAN one trip salad bar!'

All you can eat salad bar has lifetime price.

'It's great that you made your own salad, dear, but those aren't croutons, they're dog kibbles.'

'The Chef's Salad isn't available today. She ate it herself.'

"I want a big-a*s salad."

"Chef's special: tossed salad, no dressing. It's dress-down day."