Sainthood Enthusiast T-Shirts

'That's Saint Throbbold. Patron saint of migraine.'

Santa Claus's Mail

High security Santa's grotto

"Ernestine is trying to get St. Patrick to change his mind."

Night-time halo

"I prefer to talk to Mrs. Claus. She doesn't care if I'm naughty or nice."

"I admire your enthusiasm, but you’re not really flying."

'I'm told you've been born again, again and again. . . ?'

Revival Meeting - Simultaneous translation of all talking in tongues.

"Anything but milk and cookies."

'This year I'm deliverying everything FedEx!'

'How do we know the NSA hasn't hacked your naughty list?'

"It would be great if you could turn the smoke machine down a little during worship..."

Santa CGI Effect

'You still owe me the pony from last year!'

"Pepperoni pizza is my favorite! Ah, Billy, you little suck up!"

'How do you think he stays so merry through the holidays?!'

"Naughty? Nice? It's a bit more nuanced than that..."

"I want a pony!"

'There really IS a Santa!' Santa busts pets eating his milk and cookies

'Well, I'll try, but cheese seems to be the 'must have gift' this year.'

'And that,and that,and that...'

Why are you insisting on spending Christmas in hospital, Gran? I prefer the Santa here, darling.

The Reindeer Strike

"Amazon wants to open a facility here due to our friendly labor environment."

"Well, what would YOU like for Christmas?"

"We're wasting our time. He gets them free at work."

"Will she know what this is in reference to?"

"For the last time… do not feed bubble gum to the reindeer!"

Hot food cafe open every day except Christmas Day.

"I can't tel you what an honor it is to be the keynote speaker at the Supply Chain management Seminar."

Credulity, Superstition and Fanaticism.

SANTA'S ATTORNEY

Great Moment in North Pole History

'It's true, nobody ever elected me C.E.O. However, I always just assumed I was.'