Saint Pillows

'Ferguson always was an overachiever.'

"Ernestine is trying to get St. Patrick to change his mind."

Tiny Visions

"It's true: no more burpees."

'Yeah, I know your idea of heaven is to play golf all day, but all we have is shuffleboard!'

"Of course, I'm willing to negotiate. . ."

'Kids like my presents, but do they really like me?'

Child writes letter to Santa reading 'Sorry Santa, I DO want to go to school'.

You Will Have a Merry Christmas. . . Resistance is Futile.

'I've prepared a self-evaluation which you can refer to when you do my annual review.'

Gracie sees a plane on Christmas Eve and tells her dad Santa is flying it.

'Just tell him you mind your teacher and do your lessons. You don't have to prove it.'

"I didn't get anything I asked for last year so I want your acceptance of this year's list to be notarized."

'Listen, Santa. Either you repay what you owe, or we reposses Rudolph!'

'Yes, I think you better had ask Santa for it. Because there's no way I could afford to buy it.'

"Maybe this year..."

"That would've gone better if I'd gotten here with my gift list instead of my spelling list."

Next World Tours

'Santa, don't believe him. He's the one who ate the cookies and milk last year.'

"Psychiatric emergency service? Please come fast, I have one here who believes in me!"

'Be good! Santa's watching!'

"I'm a little angel when I'm asleep. Does that count?"

"If you're not a good boy, Santa will bring you only educational toys."

'Het Dad, I don't need a bike from Santa anymore. I just found one behind your wardrobe!'

"Relax, I grade on the curve."

'I'm good. How are you?'

'Shhhhh...He's preparing for the holiday season.'

"Hmmm...says here that you were in charge of your church's Puppet Ministry."

"Do you have all those things in stock?"

'You know, it's not good for kids' self-esteem to keep harping on about this 'naughty or nice' stuff.'

"Another one asking me to fix the climate crisis."

"The lost password department's that way."