Saint Bernard Enthusiast Pillows

Rescue Dogs

'Don't worry, I'm off-duty today: The cask is empty...'

'One thing, however - if they DO bite you, you don't suffer!'

Santa Claus's Mail

High security Santa's grotto

"Ernestine is trying to get St. Patrick to change his mind."

'Stuck on a desert island, in the middle of the ocean, with only a palm tree for company, it's a bloody joke.'

"I prefer to talk to Mrs. Claus. She doesn't care if I'm naughty or nice."

"I admire your enthusiasm, but you’re not really flying."

"Anything but milk and cookies."

Shakespeare Quote

Santa CGI Effect

'How do we know the NSA hasn't hacked your naughty list?'

Santa 'Freezing' Claus.

"Pepperoni pizza is my favorite! Ah, Billy, you little suck up!"

'You still owe me the pony from last year!'

'How do you think he stays so merry through the holidays?!'

"Naughty? Nice? It's a bit more nuanced than that..."

That dolphin drinks like a fish.

"I want a pony!"

'Well, I'll try, but cheese seems to be the 'must have gift' this year.'

'There really IS a Santa!' Santa busts pets eating his milk and cookies

'And that,and that,and that...'

"OK, so you've won the mating fight, but will you please allow me visiting rights to see my kids?"

The Reindeer Strike

"Alas poor yoghurt - I knew it well..."

"We're wasting our time. He gets them free at work."

'It's a statue of St. Francis of Assisi. I had it specially made for my hospital.'

"Well, what would YOU like for Christmas?"

Why are you insisting on spending Christmas in hospital, Gran? I prefer the Santa here, darling.

Hot food cafe open every day except Christmas Day.

"For the last time… do not feed bubble gum to the reindeer!"

"I can't tel you what an honor it is to be the keynote speaker at the Supply Chain management Seminar."

Mr. Punch's Illustrations to Shakspeare

'There are lots of fish in the sea.'