Sailing Buff Mugs

Captain of ship, surrounded by rough drafts and scrunched-up pieces of paper, says: 'Dammit bosun, we can't set sail without a coherent mission statement.'

I'm allergic to parrots, so I got an aaaarrrrdvark.

'It's a U-boat...on a key chain.'

And now on trumpet... 'Tha she blows!'

"I don't care what the owner's name is. It's bad luck."

Piracy on a boating lake

'I love it here. It really floats my boat.'

'I wonder why scuba divers always fall backwards off their boats.'

'No, Ben, making your eyes go bigger does not make the fish grow bigger!'

"You may enjoy swimming with the dolphins, Howard, but do they enjoy swimming with you?"

"What kind of sinker are you using?!"

"Let me know if you smell any large-mouth bass."

'Of course I brought the emergency flares.'

'Honey, did you bring the anti-nausea pills?'

"We seem to be going round in circles!"

On board the MS Hepatology

"....After ten o'clock is quiet time on board for the comfort of our passengers."

'Hey, you little punks wouldn't be trying to swamp me, would you?'

Submariners' Eye Test.

"Quick! Hide the valuables."

"It's a survival instinct...they know there's an underwater pipe pumping out untreated effluent somewhere around here."

'I need to buy some gas, but I forgot my wallet. Do you have $18,000 on you?'

"Hey wader, there's a fly in my sloop"

'Daddy says, 'Better drowned than duffers if not duffers won't drown'. Well, let's just hope social services don't hear about this.'

"What a beautiful day to set sail!"

"A textbook landing..."

The Bonvoy Age...

Tug Of War

Have a very piratical Birthday

Flying Dutchman

'Well we don't have to worry about paying for the boat anymore.This is our final notice.'

'Oops, sorry about that,sir.'

Woodpecker Ark.

A writer goes sailing.

A Heavenly Sight (The Rime of the Ancient Mariner).