Safety Juggler Gifts

'Settle down! The bell is a signal for me, not for you.'

'Just taking the dog for a walk, Dear.'

All of our representatives are busy right now. Stay on the line and someone will be with you in a few miles.

Stop and Birch

'Technically, he's on a leash, so I say we let this one go.'

A child and his dog

Education Guidance

Business cartoon showing a stressed business woman who has three urgent messages on her office door.

Days without an incident.

"Oops! My mistake, that was your projected trial load for this year, not this month."

"History test? But I studied all night for a math test!"

'I don't like being a crash dummy either but there are some jobs humans won't do.'

Insurance company agreeing workers' compensation policy in a demolition company.

"I wish I had done more pro bono work. I need the tax write offs."

"Shister and Shyster Attorneys at law"

"I'm running late for totally dignified reasons."

"Be careful — these plates are hot."

Clown uses skirting flower to prevent hot foot

'You don't mind distractions as much as me, so I didn't think you'd mind if my kids played in your office today.'

"As your attorney, Roger, I feel it's my duty to charge you an enormous amount of money."

'Your mother and I are worried that all these video games may be having an effect on you.'

"I never promised I would get you off. I alleged it."

"I have to get this project finished."

"What did I tell you about destroying Mommy's inner balance?"

'The Constitution guarantees you a speedy trial -- so hold on tight!'

"Oh I never lose any sleep over my criminal cases. I figure that even if I lose, I'm not the one going to Jail!"

'I like my plea bargain better. I plead guilty and you dismiss the charges.'

'No I haven't got a light, shove off!'

'I know my electric bills are way over due, but could you at least wait until the Super Bowl is over before turning off my electricity?'

"We don't need airbags, I filled the car with marshmallows."

'Is the drain still clogged, Henry?'

'Mac, when are we going to get the pickup truck fixed?'

Sign: Gritty Urban Experience, Next 10 Exits.