Sadomasochism Pillows

'You see, my boy, there'll always be a market for whips.'

"Of course I know how to use a chainsaw!"

Man posing on beach as women ignore him.

Gas: Regular/Hi-Test/Testosterone

Important Muscles.

"Come on, we all know you're the new Alpha Male: No need to rub it in by wearing a badge..."

Soldiers' Ego

"Fill'er up with testosterone."

"Science has proven that if you don't know what you're talking about, people will still take you seriously if you act like you do...Especially if you back it up by saying 'Science has proven' it."

"This is all my own hair."

"Wanna come over and watch the big game?....I was actually talking about the new 'Pac-Man vs. Superman' X-box game."

"Football and hunting - what more could you ask for?"

"If he'd done that to me, I'd have got up and given him a good thump!"

"Clothes, hell. It's the desk that makes the man."

Sado-masochists reading in bed.

"There's one telltale sign a man is interested in you....He weeps when you mercilessly mock him and all that he holds dear....It also weeds out the 'men' who are afraid to cry."

'John's hiding. I expect His wife gave him quiche again for lunch.'

'That's a good start, Betsy, but could you make it more macho?'

"Handsome isn't he? And I've heard he's the Head Bed Bug in a five-star hotel too..."

'Oh yeah? Well step outside to my hotel room and say that.'

'I'm sorry, Ma'am, but medical science still has a lot to learn about machismo.'

Arm and leg wrestling.

Bill just couldn't wait for his testosterone to kick in.

"I recommend the lobster today, sir, if you think you're man enough."

Break-ins by the Masochist Society

"Your old boyfriend came by. He wants to patch things up."

'Bad hairy-chest day.'

The Men Thing. . .

Soft answer that turneth away wrath bar and grill...formerly, Salty's

'Oh yeah? Step outside and say that!'

Extreme sports psychologist.

'We're gonna have lovely hangovers in the morning!'

'My mom would never let me get one before.'

"Now that's a splinter."