Saber-tooth Aficionado T-Shirts

'It even has its own built-in home security system!'

Wouldn't it be cool if we could live in the Middle Ages, Randy? We could roam the countryside on horses and carry swords. We could hang out in taverns and drink ale, maybe earn enough coin to hire a hero … Then we could go on a quest. Maybe slay some golems. I think it's a real sign of intellectual maturity that we haven't even mentioned maidens yet. Real Middle-Ages maidens would eat you for breakfast.

No Cavity Club/No New Gum Receding Club

Before Cordless Light Sabers

'Why is it always me that has to put the cat out?'

Tooth fairy pays with card

"You always said nothing would ever come between us."

"Now she could watch the special on root canal treatment."

"Have you ever considered getting braces?"

'So you have to ask yourself: do you feel lucky?...well do you, monk?'

'New rule. From now on you don't just sit in the penalty box. You also get a root canal.'

'Look out, it's a double edged sword. . .'

'Mind that molar, careful of that canine...'

'It even has its own built-in home security system!'

"Me admit was awesome idea but maybe saber tooth tiger just not cut out for domestication."

'I'm moving up to be Chairperson-of-the-Board. One of you will be President.'

'That should do it. We'll see you in six months for your next cleaning.'

"Fool, I said a spotted one."

No, I'm not storing food in my cheek right now: I have a toothache...

"No - you put the cat out."

'Going private also means I get ten per cent off Dental Implants and Replacement Crowns!'

Bicuspid: A cuspid that can go either way.

Their honeymoon was a disaster. She spent all night in the bathroom, flossing.

' How many times a year do you visit the dentist?' 'Twice, one for each tooth.'

"Who's going to carve?"

"Hey! I got a lot done in one day!"

'As a typically observant medical provider, the extremely high levels of iron in your system have me quite puzzled.'

"Granny must be very rich, she's sold everything to the tooth fairy."

'You don't trust me, do you?'

'That's the second gold tooth he's swallowed.'

"Far out, they're literally playing with fire! No way they can survive as a species if they're so risk prone!"

A beaver with his false teeth in a glass.

'It's a steal once you realise what a negotiated settlement costs.'

'It seems silly to me, too, but there's a local ordinance against handguns.'

'If Larry didn't stay in touch with his imaginary childhood friends, he wouldn't have any clients at all.'