Rural Lifestyle Appreciator Pillows

Potential Undesirable Side-Effect of a 'Car-less' Society.

Please Drove Carefully.

Lamb Noise.

'I'm collecting manure for my strawberries.' The woman says, 'I always put cream and sugar on mine.'

"Static cling."

"You say that using a colicky horse to pull you out of the mud may actually help his colic?"

"Your shepherd, Louie, has retired. I'm Mr. Smathers. I will be your grazing-resource coördinator and flock welfare-and-security manager."

“Typical, first we lost our winter fuel payment, and now our woolly jumpers!”

LAST-MINUTE CAMPAIGN STOP

'Oh God I hope that bunch of rednecks aren't waving at me!'

'Yes, we have a very diversified economy around here.'

'Oh, I plow the fields, Greta takes care of the house, and young Johan, here, maintains the website.'

'Cows have bells because their horns don't work.'

'Jimmie, run and tell your dad the tractor is flooded.'

"Welcome to Randolph, Vermont. Don't even think of relocating here!"

Mummy?!

"Ok Lassie, cut out the smart arse bit and just herd the sheep."

Boy, this stuff's hard to swallow!

'I'm not feeling well. I think I've got human flu.'

'There'll be a special meeting of the board concerning the recent generous contribution of stock.'

A cow on a drip.

"I like friut flies!"

'Oh Yeah! It's frosty! BOO-YAH!'

'Toilet paper, Lassie! Fetch toilet paper! Stupid mutt!'

The physics of the situation had Jed confused. The cow had merely ambled onto the haystack, so was clearly not a leapt-on Yet at the same time, it clearly was a moo-on.

"I can't afford to feed you."

'My practice is limited to small animals, Sir....'

Welcome to a Sleepy Little Town - name available on request.

'Why should I be scared? I'm not a crow...'

I've been doing sit-ups!

"Quick! Get your gun, Pa! Here come the suburbs."