Running Coach Gifts

The London Marathon (cockney rhyming slang variations).

"Let's take it easy for the first two miles."

'No peeking!!' - Learn to Run Classes.

"This is a merit-based organization! Can't you see I’ve hired the very best and most qualified yes-men money can buy?"

"Good game."

'Reading, writing and arithmetic are important, son. Someday you might sign autographs for money.'

"You think you can? Think again, mister. You know you can. Got that?"

I like the Jets...I guess

"Those aren't coconuts, they're tennis balls." "Sweet mother of Novak Djokovic!" The island of lost tennis balls.

Reach for the Star.

'My feet are killing me.'

"Just another 50 decibels on your grunt and we can start to think about letting you hit a few balls!"

"Portrait of a Lady"

'I love your cardiovascular system!'

"There will be a winning team and a losing team. Are you OK with that?"

"Still, diving for it would look good on my college application.

'Sure beats your cupping your ear!'

'What distance! Pity it wasn't the hammer!'

'Your shoe's untied.'

'These goalscoring celebrations are getting out of hand.'

'Run, run, as fast as you can!'

'Thou shalt not steal...except for bases.'

Time Is Money

'Hang in there, Larry, those endorphins will soon kick in.'

The trauma of losing.

Banana Split...

e-shoes

"Good game, good game, nice game, namaste, good game, nice game ..."

"They met in the express-checkout lane at the A.&P. and have slowed down only occasionally ever since."

Go! Means NOW!

Back to school.

'OK, everybody, calm down,,,'

'Which one of you told Glurk to stretch before running?'

"A journey of a thousand miles begins with a MAP, actually."

'Twenty years ago I began jogging five miles a day - could you tell me where I am?'