Runner's Rival T-Shirts

"I'm weighed down with so many gadgets, I'll need a push to start me off."

Danger Slow Sand.

"Oh, oh, it seems they've had a little trouble with the hand-off in lane number three."

Women in a cross country race

"I bet you can't name one person who makes a better lengua casserole than me!"

'I hate running in the outside lane.'

'Stress'

'Not my short list, O'Neil! You're on my other list!

'As your doctor, I'd strongly advise that you not laugh at your wife when you beat her at tennis!'

T-Rex Racing: A Short-Lived Sport

He won't stop talking about being the fastest ever. He's a broken record about breaking a record.

Runner's High, Runner's Low

"Still on your left."

Loser's Podium.

'I was this close to the finish line and then somebody threw a stick!'

Academy.

Alien abducts Olympic athlete.

The Tortoise and the Herring. Triathlon. I always knew that I'd pass him after the swimming portion of the race.

Congratulations for male runner

A number of runners run through police tape.

'Well, did you win or what?'

"I do my best thinking in the shower... do I need to run 5 miles a day in order to take one?"

"I don't get it. If he's no faster than me, how come he always beats me?"

'This could save us a bundle on electricity...by the way, Bob, how fast can you run?'

Cheetah in at the start of a race, thinking: 'Why do I have to keep proving myself?'

"We ran into a marathon."

Portrait finish.

Organically Grown Athlete - Guaranteed free of chemicals.

"It's vitally important to me that we beat the other elevator."

Annual pursuit of free agents in the off-season.

"I have bad knees."

'Knock it off, you two. This is why I hate double dating.'

The pole bolt

"When it came to running, Kevin was second to none."

Linford Christie