Royalty Themes T-Shirts

'What's the point of being king of the dogs if I still have to fetch his slippers?!'

'Now remember, Mrs. Smith, this is only a temporary crown...'

"Before you chop off my head, don't you think we should see a counsellor?"

"Well how about that. . . Lady Godiva bought a Harley!"

King Henry and his Cheshire bride

'You realize, we can't use the 'benign neglect' method for everything.'

Ernie Studios. Hi, Ernie. What movies are you working on? We have a script about astronauts marooned on a planet filed with talking gorillas who are in hard economic times. I think I'll call it "The Apes of Wrath"! We're casting "Reignman." The central character is a savant monarch. And we're filming a movie about a suburban town populated by women with strange, long hair ... It's called "The Stepford Weaves."

'Sire, Sodom and Gomorrah are requesting Federal disaster relief aid.'

'You can just forget about the cake.'

'Don't look at me like that! You're the one who wanted to live in a bouncy castle!'

"You don't think it's too ungapatchka?"

The Grasshopper's Feast: A Prophetic Vision

'At this rate I'll end up with more heirs than hairs!'

'I guess it's not much consolation but I thought your impersonation of the King was a riot.'

"I need a little more drama like a ten part mini-series."

"It's a cage. It's gilded, and I love it."

'Don't be silly- of course you're going into the family business!'

"Based on the feedback from advisers whom I haven't beheaded, all of my ideas are great."

King George I

'How about a game of cards?'

Czarcasm

TV jester.

'The Burrito King.'

'Did you bark, M'Lady?'

"She wishes to range free!"

'Fancy you doing a curtsey and she being a non-serving royal, you big dope!'

Uses of a Dead Cat in History: Dead Cat Crown Jewels

"He's a guard dog."

'This vacation, let's go on something OTHER than a power trip.'

'You've made a powerful enemy'

"Can you juggle a household, three kids, and a career?"

"'Conquer Spain'? 'Balance the budget'? 'Reform the justice system'? -- You call this a honey-do list?"

'Well, nobody can say you haven't grown in office.'

'I can't finish -- may I have a peasant-bag?'

"With all due respect, Sire, the Pizza King sends his kindest regards."