Royalty Seeker Gifts

Writer to Acquisitions Editor: 'Yes, I'm greatly influenced by others' writings ... particularly checks written by editors.'

"Before you chop off my head, don't you think we should see a counsellor?"

"I've decided to step down as CEO so I can spend more time with my money."

King Henry and his Cheshire bride

'You realize, we can't use the 'benign neglect' method for everything.'

'Sire, Sodom and Gomorrah are requesting Federal disaster relief aid.'

La Table

'Sooner or later, someone at the party will hand you a sandwich and a glass of wine - then what?'

"You don't think it's too ungapatchka?"

Bubbly

'Don't be silly- of course you're going into the family business!'

"Based on the feedback from advisers whom I haven't beheaded, all of my ideas are great."

'How about a game of cards?'

"The Capt'n maintains a balanced portfolio should include a number of off-shore accounts."

"And then, when I feel like a rum punch and breaded shrimp, I can just swim to Tony’s Trattoria."

"We're looking for something for our panic room."

'Did you bark, M'Lady?'

"He's a guard dog."

'How about a game of cards?'

Czarcasm

"Can you juggle a household, three kids, and a career?"

'Gunboat diplomacy won't work, sire -- we're landlocked, remember?'

'We want it painted the colour of money!'

Money Bar.

'Well, nobody can say you haven't grown in office.'

Wouldn't it be cool if we could live in the Middle Ages, Randy? We could roam the countryside on horses and carry swords. We could hang out in taverns and drink ale, maybe earn enough coin to hire a hero … Then we could go on a quest. Maybe slay some golems. I think it's a real sign of intellectual maturity that we haven't even mentioned maidens yet. Real Middle-Ages maidens would eat you for breakfast.

'I can't finish -- may I have a peasant-bag?'

"According to the map, the treasure should be right behind that door."

'Frankincense, dummy! I asked for frankincense!'

"I don't suppose you get many sovereign rulers in here anymore?"

'The deficit doesn't look nearly so bad now that we've switched to Arabic numerals.'

'I screwed up royally!'

'Charles, you're carrying this 'king of the castle' business too far!'

'Small favor, Elizabeth - before we enter the throne room, drop back ten paces.'

'He was born with a silver spoon all right, but not in his mouth.'