Royalty Seeker Gifts

Writer to Acquisitions Editor: 'Yes, I'm greatly influenced by others' writings ... particularly checks written by editors.'

"Before you chop off my head, don't you think we should see a counsellor?"

"I've decided to step down as CEO so I can spend more time with my money."

King Henry and his Cheshire bride

'Sire, Sodom and Gomorrah are requesting Federal disaster relief aid.'

'Sooner or later, someone at the party will hand you a sandwich and a glass of wine - then what?'

La Table

'You realize, we can't use the 'benign neglect' method for everything.'

Bubbly

"You don't think it's too ungapatchka?"

'Don't be silly- of course you're going into the family business!'

"Based on the feedback from advisers whom I haven't beheaded, all of my ideas are great."

'How about a game of cards?'

"And then, when I feel like a rum punch and breaded shrimp, I can just swim to Tony’s Trattoria."

'Did you bark, M'Lady?'

"We're looking for something for our panic room."

"He's a guard dog."

'How about a game of cards?'

Czarcasm

"The Capt'n maintains a balanced portfolio should include a number of off-shore accounts."

"Can you juggle a household, three kids, and a career?"

'I can't finish -- may I have a peasant-bag?'

'We want it painted the colour of money!'

Money Bar.

'Gunboat diplomacy won't work, sire -- we're landlocked, remember?'

'Well, nobody can say you haven't grown in office.'

"According to the map, the treasure should be right behind that door."

"I don't suppose you get many sovereign rulers in here anymore?"

'He was born with a silver spoon all right, but not in his mouth.'

'Small favor, Elizabeth - before we enter the throne room, drop back ten paces.'

'Frankincense, dummy! I asked for frankincense!'

'Democracy? -- do you REALLY want the bars closed every election day?'

'I screwed up royally!'

'The deficit doesn't look nearly so bad now that we've switched to Arabic numerals.'