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Oversized Cigar

Servant Painting Targets Around Arrows Shot by a King

'And Dubois, here, is in charge of due process.'

'Mind filling out this evaluation form first?'

"Wow! I can feel the synergy already."

'Try to see things from my point of view.'

'Actually I'm not the queen - I'm undercover for the Daily Mirror'.

'Investors worry about your obvious lack of a succession plan.'

The Queen's Flight

'There's another hereditary disease that runs in the royal family. Your grandfather was a stubborn fool, your father was a stubborn fool, and you are a stubborn fool.'

'I'll show you my hidden agenda if you'll show me yours.'

"Worse than a cold. It's a common cold."

'And in the next part of the ceremony you will swear allegiance to the Queen.'

'Your Majesty, the peasants are out of bread!', 'Then let them eat low-carb stuff.'

"Sorry, Dad, but it's time to consider a retirement kingdom."

"One trip to the dentist and look who's got the attitude!"

Fanciful 'Continental' Marriage of Prince George and Maria Anne Fitzherbert

'The great thing about autocracy is government can be the answer to everything.'

'And I suppose YOU'VE never started an unnecessary war!'

'Never mind. I'm sure the Royal wedding will cheer us all up.'

'I need some help with my homework, Dad -- do you know anybody who's any good at political science?'

"Sure, meritocracies are fine, but why take the chance?"

"Just because you can wear a sweatsuit all the time doesn't mean you SHOULD"

"Your signature, Your Majesty, as well as your driver's license and a major credit card."

'Not very chatty, are you? Typical British reserve.'

'Monarchy under fire': 'This royal throne of kings, this sceptic Isle!'

'You can't solve ALL your problems by beheading them.'

'Remember, my dear, it's just a starter castle.'

'We call him Palace - that's where he was conceived.'

Prince Edward

'Don't you just love having tax-exempt status?!'

'I know you're committed to hiring the handicapped, but a Press Secretary with Tourette's?'

Heart of Darkness

"No, mine has a gold band with diamonds, fleurs-de-lis, and four arches topped by a jewelled cross."

'How many times have I asked you not to bring bread and honey into the counting house!'