Royalty Aesthetic Appreciator Gifts

"Let's see - you might be just right for a little 2-turret, 1 1/2 moat unit I'm renting on West 58th street."

Demure lady with gloves

"I'm sorry, Your Majesty. It's always my intention to leave you laughing."

"Before you chop off my head, don't you think we should see a counsellor?"

'You realize, we can't use the 'benign neglect' method for everything.'

King Henry and his Cheshire bride

'Sire, Sodom and Gomorrah are requesting Federal disaster relief aid.'

'Now that's an afro!'

"Once upon a time, there was a princess who wasn't about to take anyone's sh*t."

Knight Golfing

"You don't think it's too ungapatchka?"

"It's a cage. It's gilded, and I love it."

'Don't be silly- of course you're going into the family business!'

"Based on the feedback from advisers whom I haven't beheaded, all of my ideas are great."

'How about a game of cards?'

King George I

Czarcasm

'You've made a powerful enemy'

'You've got to cure my sleepwalking, Doc - I keep falling into the moat!'

"He's a guard dog."

'Did you bark, M'Lady?'

'Gerry just can't seem to relax on holiday.'

'Fancy you doing a curtsey and she being a non-serving royal, you big dope!'

"Can you juggle a household, three kids, and a career?"

Mr Metrosexual.

'Well, nobody can say you haven't grown in office.'

The Frog Prince

'I can't finish -- may I have a peasant-bag?'

'Gunboat diplomacy won't work, sire -- we're landlocked, remember?'

"Messenger, dost thou bring me good news or dost thou bring me bad news?"

"'Conquer Spain'? 'Balance the budget'? 'Reform the justice system'? -- You call this a honey-do list?"

Princess Anne

"In my own country I didn't drive a taxi."

'Small favor, Elizabeth - before we enter the throne room, drop back ten paces.'

'He was born with a silver spoon all right, but not in his mouth.'