Royal Wedding Enthusiast T-Shirts

'I was a private guest at the Royal Wedding last weekend!'

"Wedding dresses have just shot up all over the realm!"

"I'm sorry, Your Majesty. It's always my intention to leave you laughing."

'Someone got me because I matched her purse, I've been to a rock concert, a night club and two weddings, Life as a designer dog is great but I'd trade caviar for kibble to get a good night's sleep,'

'Now that's an afro!'

'Yes, I do have some ideas for the wedding! We could fly in on jet packs, say our vows on a bridge over a piranha pool with you in a white bikini, hold the reception in a casino and honeymoon in a secret underground bunker!'

"It's a cage. It's gilded, and I love it."

King George I

'You've got to cure my sleepwalking, Doc - I keep falling into the moat!'

'Fancy you doing a curtsey and she being a non-serving royal, you big dope!'

'....Till death do you part, don't say I didn't warn you.'

King on the toilet whilst jester laughs because the toilet paper is out of reach.

'Scratch 3 and 5. 3's had a fight and 5's just going to live together instead.'

The Unhappy King

"He doesn't suffer fools gladly."

'Your Grandpa achieved greatness, he thrust greatness upon me, and then you were born great!'

"Seriously, you can't balance the budget with cushion change."

'Of all the technological advances from the last 60 years, this is one's favourite.'

'Henry, we can't begin to make progress unless your friend leaves the room.'

"Don't even think about it! I am the property of the English Monarch!"

'He'll stop being so smug when he gets his first dent.'

"Take your time. Do you see the person who made you wear that dress?"

"Of all the labour saving devices invented in the last 70 years, this is one's favourite."

'Do you Duane, paternity suit notwithstanding, take Diane...'

Royal Love

''Depression'? -- You or the country or both?'

"I should cover your ears.I'm not very good at this.'

"To be fair, I think you should be very clear about the ground rules with your next jester."

The Wedding of Sally and Joe, as captured on film by the world's first for-profit Satellite-Photography Service, from 23,300 feet

'Our top theologians have studied the issue, Your Majesty, and they agree that you're damned if you do and damned if you don't.'

Everybody forgot his jubilee.

Wedding Selfie

"I'm popping out for a tinkle."

Hoodies anticipate bride's choice of wedding dress.

Trainspotters a group of trainspotters outside a church taking down details of a Bride's wedding gown train