Royal Fascination Pillows

"I'm sorry, Your Majesty. It's always my intention to leave you laughing."

"Before you chop off my head, don't you think we should see a counsellor?"

'You realize, we can't use the 'benign neglect' method for everything.'

King Henry and his Cheshire bride

'Sire, Sodom and Gomorrah are requesting Federal disaster relief aid.'

'Now that's an afro!'

"Once upon a time, there was a princess who wasn't about to take anyone's sh*t."

Knight Golfing

"It's a cage. It's gilded, and I love it."

"You don't think it's too ungapatchka?"

'Don't be silly- of course you're going into the family business!'

"Based on the feedback from advisers whom I haven't beheaded, all of my ideas are great."

King George I

'How about a game of cards?'

'Gerry just can't seem to relax on holiday.'

'Did you bark, M'Lady?'

'You've made a powerful enemy'

'How about a game of cards?'

'You've got to cure my sleepwalking, Doc - I keep falling into the moat!'

Czarcasm

'Fancy you doing a curtsey and she being a non-serving royal, you big dope!'

"He's a guard dog."

"Can you juggle a household, three kids, and a career?"

'I can't finish -- may I have a peasant-bag?'

"'Conquer Spain'? 'Balance the budget'? 'Reform the justice system'? -- You call this a honey-do list?"

"Messenger, dost thou bring me good news or dost thou bring me bad news?"

'Gunboat diplomacy won't work, sire -- we're landlocked, remember?'

The Frog Prince

'Well, nobody can say you haven't grown in office.'

Princess Anne

"In my own country I didn't drive a taxi."

'He was born with a silver spoon all right, but not in his mouth.'

'Small favor, Elizabeth - before we enter the throne room, drop back ten paces.'

'I screwed up royally!'