Romantic Wordplay Enthusiast Pillows

"We can try and MEND a damaged heart, but not a BROKEN one."

"Can I borrow the car keys?"

"Ironically, this is the living room."

"That's the guy I hired to read Proust for me."

"Staff support"

'I'll have the crab cake, and he'll have the crabby cake.'

Guy at drink stand says to Medium: 'Medium?'

"It's OK, I'm preordained."

"Would you relax? All you guys are so tense. I just wanted to tell you to your face how enigmatic I find you."

Shakespeare does stand-up comedy in the round.

Lesser known greek gods,

Vlad the Inhaler

Please Drove Carefully.

Wok. Don't Wok.

'What amazes me most is that years ago I couldn't even spell teacher - now I are one!'

What nationality were your parents? North or south Poles?

Gay Times...

Punt Cake

"‘Extra vile old ox’? No, sir – it stands for ‘extra virgin olive oil.’"

'So tell me why you think you're suffering from seasonal ineffective disorder.'

Smith Academy. A Tradition of Excellense.

"Out damn Spot

'Hello, Acme signs? This is the Berger & Coles Law Office...'

"When you say the meek will inherit the earth, does that include the mineral rights?"

Famous Jewish Blues Singer Series.

Wishing Well, Wishing Good.

"He's sworn never to say Boudicca, ShrOwsbury, whoM, or narrative."

"A whack, whack here. A whack, whack there. Here a whack, there a whack. Everywhere a whack, whack."

"Privates Beach"

"Your soup is delicious. The broth perfectly compliments the font."

Cake Free Zone

"Who plays ball with the Dalai Lama?" "That's right." "What's right?" "Who plays ball with the Dalai Lama." "Why are you asking me?"

"Petting zoo" "Heavy petting zoo"

Wordplay: In The Bag.