Romantic Referee Gifts

'The Ref gave out 4 yellow cards, 2 reds and 7 Valentine cards.'

'...However, he is such a heck of a nice guy, we're going to give him the touchdown anyway.'

"Helen, I have decided to seek a change of venue, since it has grown increasingly obvious that I can no longer get a fair trial in this household."

'Oh, we don't keep score in our marriage, Dr. Downs, but if we did, I'd be winning 212 to 137.'

"To be honest, I'm not really surprised to hear your relationship isn't working out. You're not the first bacterium and penicillium to sit in those chairs and you certainly won't be the last."

"That's $20 for you if you pluck the tail feathers off my rival over there..."

"I don't know whether to love you or leave you - but then that's the reality of arbitrage."

'Honest, sir. I'm sorry! I take it all back.'

Rest in Peace Instant Replay

"She leaves wooden-handled knives soaking in the dishwater all night long. Your Honor."

'I agreed to a relationship coach, not a referee.'

Richard and Wendy Kozier, of Saddle River, New Jersey, with U.N. Peacekeeping Contingent

"The Jacksons will be there in about an hour and I promise you guys an epic fight!"

'You know I can never stay mad at you. Get in here, ya big galoot.'

Critics In Love

'I suppose this puts my new bike on the back burner?'

'I didn't know our relationship was SUPPOSED to be going anywhere.'

"your dad doesn't trust me does he?"

"Springtime in Paris on Google Earth. I told you I was a romantic."

"Whoa! That's a little clingy."

"See anything you fancy?"

'It will never work - there's too much difference in our metamorphosis.'

"I know it's not perfect, but, by and large, I think the jury system has served this marriage very well."

Opposites Attract: HisHers.

"Wow! I think you just moved up in the playoffs, Tom!"

A couple look at a graph on their bed

"That drives me crazy!"

"See? He's always interfering."

'Has that nasty dog been bothering you again...'

Marvin preferred the old fashioned way of arguing, before instant replay.

Milt had a friend video all of his dates so he could see where he screwed up.

Posting a letter - "Right that done...." "It's irrevocable.." "I'ts a white envelope with blue writing."

Foul play

"Yes, I guess I'm in the mood, but certain restrictions apply."

"The sun is setting earlier today."