Romantic Partner Gifts

"I don't care if she is a tape dispenser. I love her."

'Let's plan on being totally spontaneous next weekend.'

'Tell me your innermost feelings!'

"I've decided to outsource my emotional needs."

"Enough about me, but nothing about you just yet."

"Hey ChatGPT, compose an eloquent and poetic courtship monologue."

'Our special tonight is buy two, get one free. Mind if I join you?'

Couple sitting on a sofa with a filing cabinet marked 'issues' between them.

Conrad grew to resent the four calling birds his true love gave to him.

'The first time I met her, she practically swept me off my feet!'

'Do you have something that says 'possessive but afraid of committment'?'

"Miss you, too."

'I thought once you brought people together, you were supposed to drop out of the picture.'

'This is an authentic Valentine -- I got it from Saint Valentine!'

"All this waiting and it's over in thirty seconds.It's just like our sex life!"

"Linguini for two?"

Stop (in the name of love).

'It's our fifth date, so I'll take a box of impatience.'

"If music be the food of love, shut up."

'What's a gal like you doing in an ocean like this?!'

Next time you send a Valentine message over the office intranet remember not to press 'send all'.

"This is SO romantic. Jerry has the waiter singing our prenup."

A male penguin takes off his coat to help a female penguin cross a puddle.

"I can't believe you used that line to get me in here."

'Will you marry us?'

'She didn't say she'd go out with me, but she left the door open for further negotiations.'

"My relationship attachment style is Velcro."

Knight in shining armour.

The M.R.I. of Love

"In addition to the planning issue, EU directive states that washing ones partner is public is also an offence."

"I've asked you not to use the siege tower to meet women."

'So now what?'

'Maybe sharing a list of our past partners wasn't such a good idea, after all.'

"Oh honey, a chum necklace! How thoughtful!"

Snowman Tips Hat... And Head.