Romantic Experimenter Gifts

Sexual chemistry set.

Sexual chemistry set

"Darling, are you ready - I thought we'd try it on a bed of wilted spinach."

"It's been a wonderful evening, Fred -- Please don't spoil it by making me squirt you with pepper spray."

Bear Costume

Carbon Dating.

Yound Einstein disproves an early theory: 'Aha! A watched pot DOES boil!'

Chemist builds animals instead of molecular models

Cosmonaut

"I've been out of the dating scene a long time. Is kissing still a thing?"

"One day mommy's slime molds will all be yours!"

"The instructions for the beer-making kit you gave me? Didn't need them -- I figured it out for myself. Drink up."

"I know what you're thinking - all I am to you is a vector."

"What lead you to growing human tests in a test tube?"

"This is fun. I'm usually kind of a loner."

"Have you tried carbon dating?"

'I wish they'd hurry up and fix the wind tunnel.'

Astronaut love

"Perkins! What have you gone and done now...??"

"The finger bowl is courtesy of the gentleman."

Romantic Tree Carving

"Well, who's stupid idea was it to honeymoon on Moonlight bay?!"

"The trouble is, professor, you see the Erlenmeyer flask half empty and I see it half full."

"The best place to make black hole discoveries is in the bedroom."

I’d like to declare my interest. In what? Commitment. Two kids and a dog. Commitment to kids and a dog? And to going for long walks on the beach, to gazing up at the stars, to growing old together … What? I thought you were talking about two kids. That sounds like eight. And why would only tow grow old together? What about the other six? Are you saying they'll grow old at different rates? ... Or are you saying the other six will meet some untimely fate and not grow old at all? Then she asked if

Goldilocks and the three boyfriends.

Uncle Mort, have you been playing with your home genetic engineering kit again? Guilty. I was trying to clone my own DNA. For laughs, I mixed up my genes with compost. Mixed up? Technically, cross-bred. Trump is a meathead! Well, you're a vegetable.

Frank and Ernie's Relationship Advice. It's not enough to just accept that relationships are two-way streets ... You must also avoid taking side trips down alleys!

The Loving Couple

"What I mean is what do you do with yourself all day?"

"We didn't spend much time together when we first got married, so we're making up for lost time. We now have a date night 300 days a year."

'He had bulging muscles and a wallet to match!'

She did only twenty-eight of the thirty-two fouetts in the Black Swan pas de deux . . . or are my eyes deceiving me?

Cursing Scientist.

Perfect Match